Day One of my poetry class was a success! I met so many wonderful students with similar interests and the same passion as me, many of which I can already tell are amazing writers. I am beyond excited to read their work and to have them read mine. Extra bonus: my teacher is extremely cool, a published poet herself, an editor, and she has a PhD.
I signed up for this class on a whim, during a rare moment of feeling courageous and daring, Carpe Diem style (not my usual mode of emotional transportation). Naturally, I have since returned to my usual self, becoming more and more anxious about the time and money involved in school and of course the “oh what ifs..”. I started to seriously fear that what had felt like an act of courage at the time may have actually been reckless and irresponsible. I began to think of all the reasons (excuses) why I shouldn’t…”I work full time, I’m trying to save money to buy a house, do I really need writing classes to be a writer anyway…?”
But today all those fears were whisked away and I found myself inherently aware of the absolute beauty and wonder in following your passion and of the extraordinary way taking a risk, even a little one, can change your life. I had been spiralling downward, exhausted from long work hours at the office and from the dismal way I was neglecting my body as a result. Writing was just not happening, and as a person whose only Must-Have in life (besides family) is their name on a published book, I felt devastated. I was lost, separated from the thing I loved most.
All I can say is that I am so grateful for that fleeting moment of insanity I experienced back in September when I threw all the cards on the table and made that tuition deposit. You see, many of us artsy type people fancy ourselves this image of being all dark and mysterious; a lone wolf on its own path who only emerges from its cave once every hundred moons to humbly accept another Nobel Prize. But the truth is that when you’re following a dream, no matter what is it, you can never have enough support. Having smart, experienced, like-minded people to help nourish and challenge your intellect and creativity is so valuable, no matter how introverted you are. Everyone needs a little help sometimes, even the best of the best get a stuck now and then.
My advice to anyone reading this? If there’s something you’ve been thinking about trying, TRY IT (unless its drugs). Make today your day. Grab the bull by the horns. Let yourself have those moments of insanity in all of their beautiful, messy glory because those are the moments when change happens…and it does happen, inevitably. You just have to decide if you’re going to make it happen the way you want it to, or if you’re going to let it happen to you. Either way, you’re going to have to learn to embrace it so I vote, sign yourself up. I mean, the worst that can happen is you don’t like it. So what? Chances are, since you were looking for change in the first place, you weren’t really happy with whatever it was you may have given up anyway. Now you just try something else.
Of course, the best that can happen is you find a new love, or rekindle an old or withering one as I have, and lets be honest; we could all use a little more love. That’s what life is all about.